tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65154136525888164542024-02-07T07:50:19.642-06:00Tattooed Trailer TrashJust random thoughts of a wife and mommy that is just chasing the All American Dream. Duhhtattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.comBlogger100125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-35802212956469713592015-03-08T10:56:00.001-05:002015-03-08T10:57:03.569-05:00Parenting<p dir="ltr">Being a parent is one of the hardest tasks in the world. There is no instruction manual. Everything is trial and error and common sense. Most parents strive to be the best parent they possibly can and sometimes that is hard. <br>
It gets even harder when you divorce and again when one or both parents  get remarried. That's the spot I am in now. <br>
I have tried, and succeeded, in not bashing my ex husband of 11 years in front of my children. I have expressed certain issues and thoughts with my kids as to things that happen(ed) with their father and yes, maybe I shouldn't have at times. I can't take that back. But one things my children have never heard me do is degrade him and call him everything but a fucking human. We are a product of our own raising and I personally want my kids to be more than their parents were. Make sense? It does to me. Maybe that's all that matters. <br>
When you are a parent you should do whatever it takes to make sure your child (ren) are safe and you don't do things that could potentially put them in harms way. Not when it is something that you have total control over. <br>
What I am talking about, (and yes, this may piss some people off) is YOU DON'T FUCKING DRINK AND DRIVE WITH YOU KID IN THE VEHICLE! Yes, I drink on occasion. Not daily. Hell, not even weekly. Yes, I have drank, and gotten drunk, around my kids....knowing that we were all going to be safe and sound because either we were staying at that one place, or someone else that didn't have even 1 drink, was driving. <br>
I am aware that many people, and some of my very best friends, will go to dinner with their families and have 1 or 2 drinks and then load their families up and drive home. I don't judge them, don't fault them in any way. I don't do this. Ever. I will not and have not taken even a sip of fucking alcohol and then drove my kids. It's a rule that I have. It's a rule that their father was in agreement with....until he married this dumb bitch that he married to now. <br>
There have been many broken promises to my kids from their father aka SUPER DAD, that he won't drink and drive them anymore. My kids has issues with this as well. <br>
With all of that being said. Here is what triggered this rant...Keigan went to stay the weekend at her dad's house. I had to make her go spend time with him because she hates going over there because of his wife. His wife who has admitted to hating Keigan....who is 11! This bitch is almost 50 and says she hates the daughter of a man that she is now married to. I have bitten my tongue for the last fucking time. <br>
Anyway, I found out that keigan was at some "party/gathering" and she told me that her dad was drinking and she was scared and didn't want to be there but didn't want to cause problems either. I had her put her dad on the phone and tried talking to him about the situation but that was like trying to drink milk with a fucking fork. He became so hateful and said the most hurtful and hateful things to me while Keigan was standing there. She was hysterical. <br>
I was at a birthday celebration and not in my own car so I called my sister in law, (Scott's brothers wife) and explained to her what was going on and they went and picked up Keigan and took her home with them. <br>
I'm at a loss and not really sure what my options are, but I can assure you that some shit is about to change. </p>
tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-51079626832182249202015-02-17T22:51:00.001-06:002015-02-17T22:51:16.716-06:00These eyes<p dir="ltr">These eyes have seen a lot. They have seen the pain of death, not only their loved ones, but for many others as well. <br>
These eyes have seen love and watched fade away. They have seen the joys and heartbreak of being a parent. <br>
With these eyes I have been able to witness many joys, ups, downs abs everything in between. I wish a few people could see themselves through these eyes. Maybe then they would see what I see, and maybe somehow they would know the things I would say, if only I could it into words. These eyes are my favorite part of ME!</p>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBiYNJ5cf_E92NXgTTiujn3Ga4PeMYFeCVv8hXnOkPIwE_b_AK7-3mWuj7bp9lgf_S3ovhEM3OXJ-EvgyDaxrVx1ftuQa-SrMlQglnIdieIsTKVcBRvrr1sXb4yzOS_b988HjeBXwFoHID/s1600/IMG_20141205_173943.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBiYNJ5cf_E92NXgTTiujn3Ga4PeMYFeCVv8hXnOkPIwE_b_AK7-3mWuj7bp9lgf_S3ovhEM3OXJ-EvgyDaxrVx1ftuQa-SrMlQglnIdieIsTKVcBRvrr1sXb4yzOS_b988HjeBXwFoHID/s640/IMG_20141205_173943.jpg" /> </a> </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSXCutdcgiu3vfxgxul4cOK-h_QZuVErZUrupdvLIxW0NBfNJ4ARuboi5hWP6Y2-wDJ_1zal8_qRMIVp1NHO8BT3ULx7UfBufYJTDpTUkAK8ouHh94O_kRjh469yjlUgZXC6fAYhQPAgKl/s1600/20150213_114458.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSXCutdcgiu3vfxgxul4cOK-h_QZuVErZUrupdvLIxW0NBfNJ4ARuboi5hWP6Y2-wDJ_1zal8_qRMIVp1NHO8BT3ULx7UfBufYJTDpTUkAK8ouHh94O_kRjh469yjlUgZXC6fAYhQPAgKl/s640/20150213_114458.jpg" /> </a></div>
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Ugh, only because I can't think of anything else at the moment that is appropriate to post about, I will post about my hair...let me just say that I wish I had not cut it off. I am now doubling up on Biotin to help my hair grow faster so that it will grow back out like I had it. If I ever talk of cutting it off again, someone please knock the shit out of me!!!! </div>
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With that being said, I absolutely love having the black and pink again and I am sure I will keep it like this for a while. </div>
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tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-67451736744433842182014-11-03T20:04:00.000-06:002014-11-03T20:04:07.063-06:00I DID NOT WRITE THIS, BUT...I LOVE IT! <h2>
I did not write this and I don't know who did, I just copied it from Facebook. </h2>
<h2>
<br /></h2>
<h2>
1. We’re always messing with you</h2>
Don’t take it too seriously. We’re playful, like cats with laser
pointers. You’re the cat and we’re the laser pointer. Or something, I
don’t know. Just take the joke and throw it back, okay?<br />
<h2>
2. Mean comments are displays of affection</h2>
There’s nothing more intimate or affectionate than me calling you an asshole and kissing you afterwards, trust.<br />
<h2>
3. We remember everything</h2>
That time you tripped outside the movie theatre, that embarrassing
picture of you dressed as a LAX bro on Halloween freshman year. We like
to keep our joke bank fresssssh, so don’t think that anything goes
unnoticed or is off limits.<br />
<h2>
4. You can make fun of us too</h2>
We can honestly take a joke, even about our appearance. It’s fun when you bite back.<br />
<h2>
5. We come off cocky, but it’s a front</h2>
We’ll say inflated things about our appearance, like “I’m just so
gorgeous” or “damn I look good” when we’re at our worst. We’re not
infallible and we don’t spend hours on our faces. We don’t actually
think we’re the shit…well, okay, we kind of are, but we will not say it
like that.<br />
<h2>
6. If you don’t know if we’re joking, safe to assume we’re joking</h2>
The default mode of your phone is silent, and the default mode of my mouth is sarcastic.<br />
<h2>
7. We ARE laughing at you. But that’s because we like you</h2>
I wouldn’t laugh at you if I didn’t think you could laugh at me too.
Your misery might make me smile, but only because I want to be the one
to help you up and hug you after you fall down.<br />
<h2>
8. We have soft, gooey centers under the hard exteriors</h2>
We’re like rude Entenmann’s cookies. We’re only this sarcastic
because we have mad layers of depth and feelings. For every mean thing
we joke about, we have five more nice things to say about you.<br />
<h2>
9. If I’m ignoring you in a big group, it means I like you, yes you, the one I’m not talking to</h2>
Don’t get used to the loads of attention we pay you when we’re alone.
We’re not really about PDA or making you feel like royalty when there
are a bunch of people around. We’ll never be the ball and chain, and the
more we ignore you, the more we can make eyes at you and mouth “I hate
you,” which is basically a sign of head-over-heels, stupid crazy
affection.<br />
<h2>
10. I hate you = I love you</h2>
Always. Always. Always.<br />
<h2>
11. Learn to take a little hit</h2>
We’ll shove you, playfully slap you for a good joke, and obviously
hit you with a verbal shot to your glass jaw. The better you take it,
the more we love you.<br />
<h2>
12. We will say something really mean and immediately wish we didn’t say it</h2>
It’s almost like sarcasm is this involuntary reaction and we. can’t. stop. being. sarcastic.<br />
<h2>
13. We will occasionally say something incredibly sincere, but you won’t notice because you’ll think we’re being sarcastic</h2>
..And then we feel pretty foolish for putting ourselves out there.<br />
<h2>
14. There’s nothing in my eye</h2>
I am actually having an emotional reaction to something. I’m not sure
what this salty watery substance is coming out of my eyeballs right now
but it happens sometimes when I get upset. You don’t need to stare at
me like I’m on fire. I have feelings!<br />
<h2>
15. I actually have a lot of feelings</h2>
I’m not an emotionless robot, I’m just a sardonic lady. I like to joke and mess around, but that doesn’t mean I’m a stoic rock.<br />
<h2>
16. I know it may not seem like it, but I’m not trying to play it cool</h2>
We are so sensitive, if that wasn’t obvious by now. Too sensitive.
Could be why we are so sarcastic, but whatever, that’s dumb, we cool, we
cool.<br />
<h2>
17. We’re bad with making moves</h2>
We truly, honestly do not know how to give you the signal that we
like you or that we care about you. We are hoping you will see through
our sarcasm and see we’re basically dying for you to notice us.<br />
<h2>
18. Being sincere doesn’t come easy</h2>
So when we get serious, you need to pay attention. (Or like cherish it or whatever).<br />
<h2>
19. In the truest reality, you’re dating a sensitive, affectionate, loving lady</h2>
Sarcastic girls are really the sweetest girls. Just shut up about it, okay?tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-79276817682272235052014-09-02T11:52:00.002-05:002014-09-02T11:52:42.709-05:00Keigan finally met JAKE WORTHINGTON<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVXbLOQ4vvA6BxikQZB8U24EZMMl02YBqgCv4UOALVzaoFuuMOe_EUMswo2na_IWeiuwb98tea2Kncx1Zut3pAmDeEKERJj6Kd9uX_97BNB_O0JutwjvX-fA8KgfJCinI-AGCDC-1DbTQL/s1600/20140828_182627.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVXbLOQ4vvA6BxikQZB8U24EZMMl02YBqgCv4UOALVzaoFuuMOe_EUMswo2na_IWeiuwb98tea2Kncx1Zut3pAmDeEKERJj6Kd9uX_97BNB_O0JutwjvX-fA8KgfJCinI-AGCDC-1DbTQL/s640/20140828_182627.jpg" /> </a></div>
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It is no secret that Jake Worthington (from Team Blake, on The Voice) is from right here in La Porte where we happen to live and where my kids happen to go to school. While Jake graduated this part year, he has a younger brother that is a freshman along with Dawson. They play football together. </div>
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We have seen Jake many times picking up Reid from football, and Keigan always gets super excited when she sees him, but she is scared to death to try to speak to him. It's so funny to see her get so excited. </div>
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Anyway, this last Thursday was the first game of the season, and Dawson needed me to bring a shirt to him so Keigan and I went early and watched the B team play before the A team. I sent Dawson a text when we got there and made him come down to the gate to get his shirt, and she told Keigan he was sitting with Jake. The look on her face was priceless, and I wish I would have taken a picture, but I didn't. We followed Dawson but we didn't go sit where he was sitting, but close enough that Keigan could keep a close eye on Jake. Lol. </div>
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I sent Dawson a text and told him his sister was freaking out and Dawson kept trying to get her to come up there, but she would not go alone. After about 5 minutes, I finally moved up there where Dawson was, but she was STILL NOT going to speak to Jake. It was probably a good hour later, and only after we were talking to Jake's mom, just as Jake was leaving, he came over to Keigan and sat behind her and asked if she wanted her picture taken with him. She was beyond excited, and scared to death. So, I am sure Jake nor his mom, will EVER see this blog post, but, Thank YOU Wendy Worthington, and Thank YOU Jake for making my daughter so excited!!! She will forever be a huge fan of yours! </div>
tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-27275955411601008122014-09-02T11:35:00.001-05:002014-09-02T11:36:01.839-05:00My EVERYTHING<p dir="ltr">These 2 will NEVER understand what they mean to me until they have babies of their own.</p>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkypm_980Ihuc9sgOyVT7cSImYSST85p3z7Ih9SIbhu-n5lH1VVJVETZ01ZQgYM9VxseLHlj-CMwaOw7DZQzqyiDrkoaJfnuPQ742i6rp25qRgpBmMyhQP7DoEmv-2CTdsqhzy8v3YgROZ/s1600/aviary_1408154618296.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkypm_980Ihuc9sgOyVT7cSImYSST85p3z7Ih9SIbhu-n5lH1VVJVETZ01ZQgYM9VxseLHlj-CMwaOw7DZQzqyiDrkoaJfnuPQ742i6rp25qRgpBmMyhQP7DoEmv-2CTdsqhzy8v3YgROZ/s640/aviary_1408154618296.jpg" /> </a> </div>
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Ok, I posted this as a draft when it first happened, and now here I am like 3 weeks later, finally going to finish this post. Dawson broke his hand on the last day of the first week of football practice. First day in full pads. First year of high school football....Yeah, he was really thrilled. NOT. </div>
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He had to have surgery to have pins put in on August 22...the same day as their scrimmage game. Another disappointment...</div>
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He was however given a full release, and was able to play in the first game of the actual season. Needless to say, he was very excited about that. So far he has had no problems at all, and has had no pain. We go back to the doctor this week so they can look at it, and change the dressing, and maybe we will get to see the pins :-) as we have not seen anything because we were given orders DO NOT TAKE THE DRESSING OFF! </div>
tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-60789977573911747622014-08-11T22:34:00.003-05:002014-08-11T22:34:41.384-05:00Football Time!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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LP! Go Bulldogs!! </div>
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Growing up I went to one of the so called "prestigious" schools...Deer Park. Our biggest rival in football was La Porte. I can not even begin to express how excited I am that my son is going to be playing football for La Porte! Not only that...he will be playing with Reid Worthington! For those who do not know, that is the little brother of Jake Worthington...from Team Blake on The Voice!!! </div>
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When I went and picked Dawson up from his first official high school football practice this evening, Jake was standing in the parking lot talking to a friend of his. I just think it so awesome that this young man can come off of The Voice Tour and still just hang out in parking lots. He doesn't seem to have let any of the fame get to his head. No, I did not act like some crazed fan...I never said a word, just admired his humbleness...</div>
tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-48091536429470636952014-07-22T16:00:00.001-05:002014-07-22T16:00:53.696-05:00Stupidity, selfish....Ok, I have completely washed my hands of a life long friend and all of her family. I am D-O-N-E, done!<br />
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As stated in previous posts, Joni's daughter Alex asked me to help her find a couple that would adopt her baby when it was born because she knew that she could not take care of it, and she is not ready to be a mother. Not to mention, mentally, she is not ready to be a mother. She is almost 20 and is mentally about 16. All bullshit aside.<br />
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Well, Saturday, the 19th, Alex went into labor and went to the hospital and when they decided they would keep her until she had the baby, she called the adoptive mom and told her what was going on and asked her to drive to Austin and come to the hospital, so without hesitation, the adoptive mother did just that. After being up all day and taking care of her own 4 year old, she drove in the middle of the night to be with Alex.<br />
The baby was born at 4:27 the next after noon, on the 20th.<br />
Yesterday, the 21st, I got the call that Alex was possibly going to change her mind. Alex said she needed me to be with her to help her and support her and let her know that giving the baby up was the best thing she could do. Without hesitation I drove to Austin to be with her, and be supportive and reassure her that even though this was a hard choice, it was the best choice. Well, by the time I got there, she apparently already had her mind made up and was keeping the baby. That is her right, and I get that, 100%, I get it.<br />
I talked to her for about 30-45 minutes I guess and tried to tell her how hard it is to take care of a baby and so on. I asked her what made he change her mind, and she said "he's just too cute to give away" and that if he wasn't so cute, it would be easier???!?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????<br />
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I am still too pissed off to really think straight and write about it.<br />
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Alex wanted everybody to leave the room and send the adoptive mother in the room so that she could tell her. THAT was the most heartbreaking thing I have ever had to listen to. Even though I was not in the room, I could head everything. HORRIBLE!<br />
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I feel in my heart that the baby is going to be physically hurt.....<br />
I have expressed my concerns with the hospital and social services. tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-949671486884384942014-07-15T19:07:00.001-05:002014-07-15T21:53:18.459-05:00Inquiring mindsI am sure that I have fucked up by posting something on Facebook about the matter than I am about to go into full detail about. I have gone into detail a little in a previous post, but there is more...<br />
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Sorry, but I am just going to put people on blast because it will make this post a whole lot easier.<br />
<br />
Back on May 5, 2014 while at a softball game, I received a phone call from Alex, who is like my niece. She informed me that she had had a conversation with Joni, her mother, and that Joni had told her that some sexual stuff had been going on between Rachel, her 15 year old sister, and Jason, who is Joni's 40 year old boyfriend. Alex, who lives in Austin with her Aunt Debbie, told me that they had already called the state CPS hotline and reported it, and that the local police knew and would be going out to the home and doing an investigation...which, it is now July 15th, and they are STILL doing their investigation, and no arrests have been made on the criminal aspect of this case. Joni was arrested the night of May 5th, but only on a probation violation for theft.<br />
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So on May 5th, I was contacted by Liberty Count Sheriffs Office (LCSO) and asked if I would be willing to come in to the station and talk with a detective, and give a written statement as to what I was told and by who, and also to see if I was willing to take custody of Rachel. Of course. That is what family does, right? I mean, I am NOT blood related to any of these people, but Joni and I had been best friends since November 1992 and I have been there since day one of all 3 of her kids lives. Alex is now 19, almost 20, and should be having a baby early next week. She has made the hardest decision of her life, and has decided to give her baby boy up for adoption, and I have helped her along with this process. I am the one that put her in contact with the adoptive parents. They are my family and they will be amazing parents to the baby. They have already adopted one little boy, and they are beyond excited to adopt this one. I could never know the pain and anguish that Alex is feeling, and will feel over time, but I can tell you that she has matured so much since becoming pregnant that it is unreal. I have been nothing but supportive of her, and I will continue to support her with this decision. This is the most selfless thing a mother can do. It doesn't mean that they don't love their child, it means they loved them first! Alex knows that she can not take care of and raise a child right now, in anyway, shape or form. I wish people would stop talking so much shit to her and trying to get her to change her mind about this....some of these people being her own fucking mother who doesn't seem to want her own fucking kids, as she is so willing and very quick at wanting to sign papers to let her other 2 kids live with other people, yet wants to fucking fight tooth and nail for this piece of shit, fucktard Jason's 4 kids. Who the hell does that?!?!<br />
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Anyway, what has set me off today is a phone conversation that I had, where I was informed about this holy roller bitch name Carol, running her fucking head to other people about me. This is Joni's aunt, who Rachel is now staying with. (I will get to that in a minute) This bitch has never had anything to Joni or her kids. Now all of a sudden she has found Jesus and is this holy roller, and wants to be a "do gooder" and talk all this shit. Well bitch, whatever makes you feel better I guess. But just for the record, I am the one who has legal power of attorney so....keep trying to brainwash Rachel. You think you are doing good right now, but you have no fucking clue just how vindictive and manipulative that little girl can be. When all the gettin' is done, she will be done with you as well.<br />
Wanna talk shit about my parenting, how I need to not plan vacations when it is going to cause kids to miss 2 days of school...FUCK YOU CUNT! MY family vacation was planned and fucking paid for long before Rachel was ever in the picture. It cost me another 2800 fucking dollars to take Rachel. NOBODY helped me when I had Rachel with me. Rachel decided she didn't want to be at my house because she had been lying to me the whole time she was here and I found about it and took the fucking phone away that I had gotten her, which now costs me 50 dollars a month for a phone that isn't being used. Wanna say that this is an unstable environment and that I do not take education seriously, well....guess what bitch, I guess that is why I have a 14 year old going into high school this coming year with college credits already? He makes straight A's and has missed less fucking school in all of his school years than any of Joni's kids did in a fucking semester! I guess that is why I am the one that convinced Alex to go back to high school and graduate, and try to do something with her life?!?<br />
Like I said, you don't fucking know, and I can assure you that you don't want to know me. While I do not go to church, I am a God fearing sinner. I make mistakes, yes, and so do you. I don't fault you or anybody else for mistakes. What I do fault you for is your own fucking ignorance. If you want to know something or whatever, then fucking ask me. I have no reason to lie to you, or anybody else.<br />
I have learned my lesson in trying to be a do gooder and I can honestly say, IT WON'T FUCKING HAPPEN AGAIN. I have tried to help Joni and her kids out so many times over the years it's not funny. I am the one that took care of Alex the majority of the time while Joni ran off with the fucking carnival. I am the one that was there for her when her mom passed away, even though we weren't really on speaking terms. I have been there all of Alex, Rachel and Bubba's lives....where the fuck have you been??? Oh yeah, busy dropping all this weight and walking out on your husband of God knows how many years after you became skinny, and then finding God. Well guess, I never lost God. I talk to him daily, and I don't need to pretend to be something that I am not! FUCK YOU. EAT SHIT AND GO TO FUCKING HELL!!!! There is a special place in hell for people like you and sex offenders!<br />
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So, now to Rachel, she left my house the day that we came home from Disney. She went to go stay with her Nana, which is where her brother is at. As I was dropping her off with her Nana, I confronted her on some stuff that I had found out that she had been lying to me about, and I took her phone away. That is when she decided that she wanted to go home to her mom. She did not want to live with me anymore. I know Rachel well enough to know that once she's got something in her mind, then she is going to do whatever to get her way. I have 2 kids of my own that I have to worry about, and I can not be having her act a fucking fool around my kids. She likes to put her hands on people. She would beat the hell out of her own mom, and kick her in the stomach. That shit would not fly around this house and she knew that. I told her from the beginning that if she ever put her hands on my kids, or myself, that I would beat her down like a fucking grown woman, and I wasn't joking and she knows that.<br />
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<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-9357648911348642182014-07-08T14:29:00.001-05:002014-07-08T14:29:27.723-05:00Just been thinking...A very good friend of mine asked me the other day, "How do you measure and put into words how much you miss someone, or how much you love someone?" and I have been pondering that question since. I guess there is really no right or wrong answer, so I don't know why I keep giving this question so much thought, but I do. While I am sure this post will be jumping all over the place, I am sure most of you will get the point, and many of you may start asking yourself these same kinds of questions. It is hard to explain emotions. It is like trying to explain colors to someone who has never seen before. IMPOSSIBLE. Oh, that's purple...a mixture of red and blue...umm, yeah, you just can't explain it because it is something that you just know, because you have seen it your whole life. <br />
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Here is what I do know:<br />
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When you tell someone "I miss you" or "I love you", it should not be out of habit. It should be because that is truly how you feel. When your first thoughts in the morning are about that one person, and you fall asleep every night thinking about that person, I think it is safe to say that you miss them. You may even love them. Love is crazy thing. They say that people don't fall out of love, that if you they say they have fallen out of love, then the love was never really thing. I call bullshit, but then again, that is my personal opinion. To me it is a fact, being that I have been there. I believe that you can love someone with every fiber in your being, and yet be in love with someone else. I also believe that so very often, in today's world, love becomes a habit. Marriage becomes a habit. Once it is a habit, it takes a lot to break that habit and either make it right again, or worse case, get a divorce.Divorce isn't an easy decision to make, but I say that if you have given it any thought at all, it's probably the best choice. Somewhere in your marriage you are not happy. I get that no marriage is perfect, and you are always going to have ups and downs, and things are not going to make you happy, so I am not saying just because one of you only wants to eat this kind of food, and the other one only wants to eat this kind of food and that makes you mad, or unhappy, that you should get divorced. There are key things that every marriage should have, and if one of them is lacking...it's probably not going to be your forever after. <br />
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Women need to hear that they are missed. They need to know that they are loved. They need to hear it, and be shown. You do not have buy them things to show them that they are loved. They need to feel needed, and most importantly, WANTED. There is a difference. There is a difference when they ask "what do you think about me?" vs "how do you feel about me?" We need passion and intimacy, and there is a difference, and it has very little to do with sex. Soft kisses are the most meaningful. No woman wants to just smash your face to hers when you are kissing her bye for the day. <br />
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Men need to feel superior. The need to feel like they are the number one provider, protector of all, but sadly, somewhere along the lines so many things get lost. Men think that once they got the prize, then there is no need to keep doing what it took to get the prize in the first place.<br />
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I have been told "I am good at the chase, but once that's over, then what's the point?" Well.......................the point is, you can not treat someone one way and then once you have them, stop doing that because in doing so, you take away everything that made that person fall in love with you in the first place and like I said, once that is gone, it is very hard to get back. Sure, you still love that person, but is it really enough to keep going and trying to make something be there that obviously just isn't? It should not be this way.<br />
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So, I know that maybe this went a little differently than how it went in my head, and maybe I should just keep my thoughts about some things to myself, but whatever. These are my thoughts and nobody gets to decide what I think, right?<br />
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<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-348102151132391292014-06-19T02:11:00.001-05:002014-06-19T02:11:01.439-05:00Pictures from Disney 2014<p dir="ltr">Just some of our pictures</p>
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The only person that did not know that we were going to Disney was Keigan. Someone had told her we were going on vacation, but they didn't tell her where, when or with who. That's fine. She thought we were going to Arkansas to see family. I woke her up at 3 in the morning and told her that someone had come into our house and they left something for her down stairs. She got up, came down stairs and found Stormy, her elf, sitting on the little table in the entryway. She had Keigan's award from school (because she would be missing the last 2 days of school) and a letter telling her that she was going to Disney World and that her Aunt Carla, Uncle Todd, and cousins Josh, Kaylee, and Jenna were going too. She was so excited. We left about an hour later, around 4 am. I had already had everybody's bags packed, loaded and ready to go.<br />
We made it to Destin Fl around 1:30 that afternoon and we played at Henderson State Park for a few hours. It was AWESOME! Out of the way, but still awesome! We finally left there and headed on to Orlando. Not sure what time we got there, but I know it was late. We got a hotel just outside of Disney and got some rest while we waited for the rest of our party to get there which would be the next afternoon. The next morning, we drove around and then went to Downtown Disney. It's pretty cool. There was a place to eat there that I wanted to go to, but due to the extra kid we had with us, it just wasn't in the funds. It was some sort of Dinosaur place. Other than that it is mostly shopping there. We didn't buy anything. lol. Everybody had already told us that it was way cheaper to buy Disney stuff from the local Wal-Mart, but we honestly were not looking to buy anything anyway. We also noticed that there was plane flying all over Orlando pulling a banner that read "WARNING: Gay Day @ Disney June 7th"<br />
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Friday was our first day of Disney and we spent it at Epcot. I personally think it was boring for the most part and I probably would have enjoyed this park better with no kids. I would have liked to have walked around and went into the different "countries" but the kids were not into all that. lol. The coolest thing there was Test Track. You design your car and then 6 people are loaded into a car and you are off to test drive. Really cool. If you ever go, I don't think I would do a fast pass for this ride because you miss out on some things, from what I have been told. So...get there early and just wait in the line. Totally worth it.<br />
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Saturday we were off to Hollywood Studios. This probably would have been my favorite day had it not been such a shitty day. Keigan started having a serious itch attack due to being so hot and having eczema. This sent me on a wild goose chase looking for some sort of itch cream or something because she left hers at home...in Texas. I went to about 5 different stores, nobody had anything and they finally sent me to First Aid, or tried too. It just so happen that it was Star Wars day at this park and they were about to have a parade with all the movie stars and all that shit. Not to mention there were 87 billion people there, dressed in full costume. Do you realize how many Star Wars freaks there are in this world? I damn sure didn't! Anyway, so I am trying to get to first aid and I can't because of all the parade shit that is about to take place. I try going out the way that some cast members told me to go and some security bitch would not let me, even after I explained to her 4 times what I was trying to do....and the whole time I can see the first aid station. She told me that I could not go to first aid, that I would have to wait about an hour. This sent me over the edge and I cussed her out and told her just how much of a rude fucking bitch she was and I went back to the store that told me to go and explained to them the whole thing that had just taken place, so the lady there sent 2 cast members to first aid for me, but the people in first aid said the could not send any sort of medication back with them, that we would have to come over there....By this time I am very fucking hot....in every sense of the word. It's like 300 degrees, and I am beyond pissed off. The last tells me not to worry, that she will call first aid and have them come to us. I instantly though, "Oh, thank God!" About 10 minutes later the paramedics show up with a gurney and a medical bag, and heart monitor....Ummm, really?!?! I explained to the medic what was going on that I was so sorry that they had called an ambulance out there for this, that if I had known that is what they were doing I would have just left the park and went to a Walgreen's or something. He said not to worry, it wasn't a problem at all, that they already have sub stations in the park due to the mass amounts of people there for this ignorant Star Wars shit. He said he could take me anyway that he needed in order to get us to first aid. YAY! We get over there and they give Keigan some Benadryl. This stuff usually wires my kids....Not today! With in 15 minutes Keigan was knocked out. Seriously. She was holding on to my shirt, walking behind me, sleeping. We sat down for a few minutes and she was dead to the world. We did get to ride some rides though. Tower of Terror, and Rockin Roller Coaster....bad ass rides.<br />
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Sunday we headed over to Animal Kingdom. Everybody that we had talked to before going on vacation, and even a lot of the people at other parks, said that Animal Kingdom sucks. Well, I will tell you that it DOES NOT suck. We had a blast at this park. This is where the the Mt. Everest, Kali River Rapids, the Safari, and so much more cool stuff is. The Tree of Life...AMAZING. The 4d movie "It's Tough To Be A Bug" super cute. We had been told that this park would be 20-30 degrees hotter than all the other parks, but it wasn't. It was 20-30 degrees cooler I think.<br />
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Monday was a very long day, for many reasons. Today was Magic Kingdom day. Started off that when we got out to my car to leave, it would not start. Had to use the roadside service from my insurance. Somehow the battery cable had come off the post? Anyway, got the car started and we were off. It was fucking hot! We spent a few hours at the park and then left to eat lunch and then we went back. When we went back, the daily Florida storms were rolling in. It did not stop us. We jumped on the tram and we were back at it. There is so much to see at this park. Hell, there is so much to see at all of the parks. You really need to get at each park when it opens, and try to take a day off in between each park. Don't get a park hopper because you will miss so much. There aren't a whole lot of thrill rides at each park, but there is still so much to do. The park was open until 1 am and we stayed there all night.<br />
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I don't even want to get into the whole story, but we had 5 day tickets to Disney and we wasted a whole day. We were going to go back to Hollywood Studios for the 5th day, but when we got back to the hotel at 2 am after Magic Kingdom, Dawson had a break down, tempers went crazy, and so we just decided to leave the next day, or same day, how ever you want to look at it. We left about 4 pm Tuesday and got home around 6:30 Wednesday morning. We had a great ride home, even after all the drama. I would redo the ride home a thousand times over if I could.<br />
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Side Note of things to know:<br />
1. Although they frown upon it, you can take a small softside cooler (like the ones on wheels that you can get at Wal-Mart) with snacks and drinks.<br />
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2. If you do not want to take a cooler, take a backpack with snack and water. That is what we did, and I will tell you that we carried 32 bottles of water in the backpack each day almost and we drank every single bottle. That saved us a hundred dollars a day just on water. DISNEY DOES GIVE OUT FREE CUPS OF ICE.<br />
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3. Get the My Disney Vacation app on your phone. You can set up your fast passes with it, and it has maps of all the parks, plus will tell you wait times and everything else you need to know that is going on in the park that you are at.<br />
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4. Rides that you must ride...Tower Of Terror, Rockin Roller Coaster, Mt. Everest, Test Track, and my mind just went blank.<br />
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5. Make sure you do every 4d movie thing. They are great!<br />
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<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-44818974738149145202014-06-18T14:50:00.002-05:002014-06-18T14:50:45.175-05:00What's been going on in my world....Okay, let me go back to May 5...I was at a softball game watching my niece play her last game of the season, when I got a phone call from another niece that lives in Austin. She said she just wanted to call and let me know what was going on with her mom (whom was my best friend for many years) and her younger sister. She said that she had been on the phone with her mom and she could hear her 15 year old sister in the background screaming and yelling and cussing out their mom and when she said something to her mom, that is when mom told her some stuff that had been going on and if anybody found out then people would go to jail. The 15 year old and the moms' boyfriend who turned 40 that day, had been having sexual relations for a while, and the mom knew...I was informed that CPS and the local authorities had been notified and they were on the case. I then contacted the Liberty County Sheriffs office to find out what was going on and that is when I was asked to come up and give a written statement as to what I was told and by who, and I was asked if I would be willing to take in any of the children in house that would be possibly removed. I agreed that I would take on 2 of the 6 kids. I know, 2 of 6 doesn't sound right, but the other 4 kids, I don't know. They are the boyfriends' kids.<br />
Once I get out to LCSO, they have me write out my statements, they wait for the statements from Austin PD to be faxed over and they contact CPS and let them know that there is a family member there that is willing to take on the moms' 2 kids if need be. The LCSO runs the name of the mom and finds out that she has a warrant and so then they decided they would go out to the house right then. By this time it is like 11 at night. They go in and arrest the mom and only one of her children is there, and the other one is at his Nana's house. They take the 15 year old into custody as well and bring her and her mom to the jail, where the mom is booked, and the child is released into my protective custody by CPS. The boyfriend still has no clue as to what is going on. He has no clue of the allegations made against him. <br />
All of this takes place on a Monday. By Friday I still have no real word as to what is going on, and I am told that I need to come up to the jail and get a power of attorney for the child so that I will be able to get her back in school seeing how I live nowhere close to where she was going to school. So I do that and then I had to go withdrawal her from school and then got her enrolled in the school over here. She started the following Monday since it was late on Friday when they got everything done.<br />
Tuesday I had to have her back in Dayton for a forensics interview and then it was back to just a normal life pretty much. The mom was sentenced to like 36 days in jail or something for the warrant on a probation violation.<br />
We did the best we could to adjust to a new child being in our house. We got her a cell phone since both of my kids have phones. We tried to make her feel just like one my kids. She had strict rules with her phone, but the same rules as my kids. No passwords on anything without me knowing. No clearing the texts or call history and I have all the log-in info for any and all social media. She was to have no contact with anybody from Dayton other than her Nana, and if and when her mom got out of jail, she could talk to her from my phone and that was it.<br />
Well, mom got out of jail a few days sooner than expected and after being out for 24 hours she finally called me. We talked for 2 hours and then she talked to her daughter....for 10 minutes and had to go because her boyfriend was calling. The same boyfriend who has been getting blowjobs from her 15 year old daughter for who knows how long, and she knows about it...yeah, she is staying with him and he is still oblivious as to anything that is going on. FUCKING IDIOT! Whatever...a couple of days goes by and the child asks me if she can call or text her mom from her phone and I told her no, that she could call her mom from my phone. She never did.<br />
June 4, 2014 we left for a surprise Disney vacation. The 2 older kids knew about it, but my youngest didn't. By this time I guess it's going on almost a week since I have talked to the mom. Just the one phone call, 24 hours after she got out of jail...with each passing day I am getting more and more pissed off. I have this poor child (so I am thinking) asking me daily if I have heard from her mom, that she misses her mom and she doesn't know why her mom isn't contacting any of us...<br />
Well, we go to Disney, which I had bought our tickets back in March, so obviously I did not have tickets for her...we get her tickets (thanks to my sister-in-law and brother-in-law) and we spend a day in each of the 4 main Disney parks. Having an extra kids with us at the last minute caused us not to be able to do everything that we wanted to do, which I won't go into all of that, but....We had 5 day passes, but we decided to come home a couple of days early so my husband could get back to work since he doesn't get vacation. If he doesn't work he just doesn't get paid.<br />
We got home about 6:30 in the morning on a Wednesday and that afternoon the child went to stay a couple of nights with her Nana. When I dropped her off with her, I found out some stuff. Found out that she had been talking to everybody she was told NOT to talk to. I took her phone away and told her she would never get it back. She said she just misses everybody, especially her mom and little brother and she just wants to be with her mom, but that she knows that probably is not an option, but that she doesn't want to stay at my house. That was all I needed to hear. I am not about to try to make her stay somewhere she doesn't want to be. Yes, I have power of attorney, but I have zero legal rights to her and can not stop her from leaving. Plus I know how she is. When she gets pissed off, she likes to put her hands on people and they will not fly in my house. I will beat her ass like a grown woman. Period. So if I were to make her stay here it would only be a matter of time until she blew up and I would probably end up in jail....injury to a child or some shit.<br />
All I can say is, she got a free trip to Disney World, took joy from my kids first ever Disney trip and is back home with the sick motherfucker who is molesting her! She knows that coming back into my home is NOT an option anymore.<br />
<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-68885083321986621162014-04-22T10:37:00.003-05:002014-04-22T10:37:54.838-05:00DeathIt seems like the past couple of weeks have been so tragic. I know several people who have been in killed in tragic accidents, and it has had me thinking. Thinking about the what ifs, and so much other stuff.<br />
The one that is bothering me the most is the loss of a very good friend's ex husband. Yes, I said ex. They were married for years, and while I will not blast her person business, I will just simply say that she went through hell with this man. She already had a son when they got together, and he loved that little boy as his own. It is the only dad that boy has ever known. Her son was named after HIM, and they later had 3 beautiful girls together.<br />
When she got the courage to divorce him, it wasn't because she didn't love him anymore. Not at all. In fact, she still loves him, and right now she is devastated, and not only mourning the loss of the father of her children, but a lover and long time friend.<br />
He also was engaged to be remarried in June and has 2 more little boys. My heart hurts for his girlfriend, and those two other babies as well. What is bothering me right now is that there is all this talk on Facebook about donating money to help the girlfriend and their 2 boys out, but nobody is saying shit about my friend and their 4 kids! This bothers the hell out of me, yet I know it is none of my business. I am smart enough to know that death brings out the worst in so many people, and people become greedy. It is crazy.<br />
Like I said, my friend is devastated and she is not wanting to talk to anybody. I am very worried about her. <br />
Please keep this family not named in your prayers! tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-67390261888348725892014-04-20T22:27:00.001-05:002014-04-20T22:28:07.390-05:00Before and after<p dir="ltr">Here is a before and after....a year later...from my gastric sleeve surgery. Almost 100 pounds gone! I'm super excited, yet I still want to drop about 20 pounds, and then I will be going to the plastic surgeon!</p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja2NB44Mwcig7f_VbcUDegkKbU-ZEVYPzjqQpeC92NF6jpBDgereQjRCjFvdnPrG5Ur2XjlOttjUhATLHmz2FEe7wJ3CDnkA_D_RTMIhht3MHY-iVRPk5ABHH3Qt3yBctmm6j7g56nuNcj/s1600/20140417_173410.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja2NB44Mwcig7f_VbcUDegkKbU-ZEVYPzjqQpeC92NF6jpBDgereQjRCjFvdnPrG5Ur2XjlOttjUhATLHmz2FEe7wJ3CDnkA_D_RTMIhht3MHY-iVRPk5ABHH3Qt3yBctmm6j7g56nuNcj/s640/20140417_173410.jpg"> </a> </div>tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-34261244020942453542014-04-15T09:10:00.001-05:002014-04-15T10:38:15.366-05:00Kolton's Cake Smash <div dir="ltr">
I went and took pictures for my pseudo grand baby, Kolton. He was not real pleased with having his pictures taken, but out of 145 shots, I did manage to get like 24 great shots...or at least I think they are great. </div>
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tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-45755614981637377642014-04-09T15:05:00.000-05:002014-06-19T02:11:34.475-05:00I suck at keeping up with this thing now.So, I have the blogger app on my phone, and I start blogs all the time, but never finish them so I just delete the draft and tell myself, "Oh, I will write another one soon" and it never happens.<br />
I have tons of shit to write about, but I have fucktards that read my shit, and I wish I could block them, yet don't really know how, but at the same time, I couldn't give a shit less what they think about what I write.<br />
I know that I have said it countless times, but I am really trying to make more of an effort to keep up with this. I would say I would try to do at least one post a day, but that probably isn't really going to happen, so I will say at least once a week. Maybe sometimes more, but....<br />
<br />
So much has been going on lately, yet right this moment all I can think about is that my baby is becoming a young woman...or has? She started her period for the very first time last night while she was at her dads house, and she didn't tell anybody, so she had to call me from school this morning and of course I went and picked her up and she spent the day with me :-) Ugh, am I really ready for this shit?!?!? Two kids with raging hormones....HELP ME!!!!<br />
<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-17867175081169092112014-02-08T23:05:00.001-06:002014-02-08T23:05:02.512-06:00True<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ5Z4ZNG1iGsnqpmFucQdSPQjrOAupav3HImJAnZFKiC6hjMA9dBIt4_TEavY8pcEX_Wg2hIm9bx3kWsnhmeoz8yrTr0C0jD8ewDu6DNLgGRxWBn1OvJTriRJPVY_Uok5pnlTVuTMPFoQ3/s1600/IMG_386362671417463.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQ5Z4ZNG1iGsnqpmFucQdSPQjrOAupav3HImJAnZFKiC6hjMA9dBIt4_TEavY8pcEX_Wg2hIm9bx3kWsnhmeoz8yrTr0C0jD8ewDu6DNLgGRxWBn1OvJTriRJPVY_Uok5pnlTVuTMPFoQ3/s640/IMG_386362671417463.jpeg"> </a> </div>tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-38025617965173551792014-02-05T14:37:00.000-06:002014-02-05T14:37:28.022-06:00Today's YouthI know I titled this "Today's Youth" but really what I am about to write about is not just directed towards youth. I seen grown adults doing it.<br />
<br />
I personally find it very disturbing when I see a teenager, and adults as well, post something on Facebook about "hating their life" or "FML" or just going on about how much their life sucks. Hello, YOUR life is exactly that. YOUR life, and it is what you make of it. Nobody is making you make the stupid decisions that you are apparently making. You are making them. Only YOU can change that. If you are 16 and pregnant, YOU are the one that laid down and willing played an adult game. If you are 18 and have a child and jump from man to man, and always talk about getting high, and then wonder why you are unhappy in love, that is something that only you can change. Keep your fucking legs closed, keep that joint out of your mouth, stop posting about it on Facebook, especially if you don't want your child being taken away, and worry about yourself and your child before you worry about trying to make a man happy, or him making you happy.<br />
We are dealt crappy hands at time, and there is nothing that we can do about that other than try to make the very best of it.<br />
I learned a long time ago that you have to live without regrets because how can you regret something that made you smile at the time. You can not dwell on the negative all the time. Face it. Put your big girl panties on and deal with it. tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-73544172505646884032014-02-04T13:10:00.000-06:002014-02-04T13:10:08.443-06:00Teeth, they damn sure can be expensive! When I was a small child, the first trip to the dentist that I can remember was a horrible time for me. To this day I can remember it, and feel the pain as if it were taking place this very moment. I got 8 fillings and 4 caps and not once time did they dentist numb my mouth. They would not let my mom go in the treatment room with me, and when she could hear me screaming out in such pain and demanded to know what the hell was going on, they informed her that doctor was just cleaning my teeth...Well, for a couple of years I would not let my mom take me back to the dentist. I mean, I guess she could have since she was my mom and I was just a little kid, but you get my point. Also, some years later that asshole dentist killed himself because he was being sued for the millionth time because of the kind of treatment he was giving to his patients. Hmm.<br />
My mom found a pediatric dentist and she started taking me there. It was a husband and wife practice and I absolutely LOVED it. I still remember their name and I have not been there in over 20 years. Yeah, seriously 20 years, but after my first visit to them I would literally beg my mom to take me to the dentist, and somehow I came to LOVE going to the dentist. Even as I got older and I knew that I would be having to get a filling or something, I still loved going.<br />
Fast Forward to post children...my teeth started going bad. I had no insurance...blah blah blah...I ended up having to have 2 crowns done at one time on the top two front teeth, and now, 5 years later I am needing more dental work done....and this time I am not loving the idea of going to the dentist. lol. tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-84203239726125275212014-01-30T12:51:00.002-06:002014-01-30T12:51:57.522-06:00FamilyI don't know about all families, but I know that when I was growing up my family was very close. Maybe not my whole family, but still. I know that I was close to my moms baby brother and his kids, and then with my dads family. Even though my dad was in prison pretty much my entire childhood, until I was 18 or 19 to be exact, his family ALWAYS welcomed my mom and I and I am telling you, that is where some of my most favorite times.<br />
I honestly do not remember a single weekend of my childhood where I was not with them at some point. We did everything together, and we did absolutely nothing together as well, but it was still a blast.<br />
We had family reunions, every year, and being that that side of my family is/was in to music, there was almost always a guitar brought out, and everybody would sing songs. It was amazing and I miss that so much.<br />
I feel like not only my kids, but probably so many kids in this crazy world, are missing out on making the kind of memories that me and my cousins made. Everybody is living life in the fast lane and it seems like we just honestly do not make enough time for life. We all need to slow down and make some time to make memories. I know that my husband I are going to start making more time and making great memories for my kids. They are honestly blessed to have such a great stepdad, and although they don't always show it, the both tell me all the time that they are glad to have him in their lives. I can assure you that this year will be a blast for them, and they will have some awesome memories of this year...even though it started off rough, 2014 will be a year they won't soon forget, if ever!!!!! tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-90114158746017333932014-01-29T11:04:00.002-06:002014-01-29T11:04:50.891-06:00Do gooders...PISS ME OFF! I am not always the kindest person, but I do often try to be. When I see that someone is struggling and I know that there is something that I can do to help, 9 times out of 10, I am going to do what I can.<br />
Recently I had a friend who's sister passed away of breast cancer after several YEARS of fighting. Through all of the fighting, and the loss of their mother, and all of the struggles, NONE of her (the one fighting for her life) friends stepped up and really offered any help. After seeing some posts that my friend had made on Facebook, I decided I would step up and help the best that I could. We started planning a benefit, and of course everybody wanted to help out immediately...until it came down to it. Through most of the planning there was only one person helping me out. Fine. Whatever. The thing that pissed me off the most, in the beginning anyway, was that one of the people that wanted to help and was all gun-ho, backed out, and that is fine, if you don't want to help that is fine. You don't know these people, blah blah...But the way that you did it, and the timing...bitch, you ain't nothing but a do gooder and you are only going to do something if YOU can benefit from it. I have seen that already. I read your bullshit post on Facebook everyday about paying it forward, but again, you only want to pay it forward if you benefit from it. You know what, FUCK YOU! There is a special place in hell for people like you.<br />
Throughout this process, others did step up and help, some ended up not being able to finish due to illness, and I get that. That is fine. It is what it is.<br />
In the end, the biggest thing that pissed me off...people trying to take credit for shit they had NOTHING to fucking do it. Let it be known that I couldn't give a shit less if anybody knows that I helped someone out, but trust me when I say that I would NEVER try to take credit for ANYTHING that I did NOT do. Because I am not a do gooder, I am NOT going blast anybody, or state exactly what I am talking about...it doesn't matter in the end because I know what happened, what is right, what is wrong, what is fact and what is lies. This whole experience has made me realize that I need to think twice before helping out, and maybe 3 or 4 times about the people I let "help" me. tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-48721693883344740862014-01-29T10:46:00.005-06:002014-01-29T10:46:59.919-06:00HmmmSo now that it seems like my life is slowing down, maybe I can force myself to start blogging again? I hope. It is a good way for me to things outta my head, but sometimes it can come back to bite me in the ass. Some people have access to reading my posts, and I feel at times I have to filter my thoughts, and I don't want to sit here to type everything out just to make it private, so...who knows?!? I have thought about deleting this account and starting a new one, but...apparently at this moment I am too stupid for that. lol. Then I think...well, do I really want to go through all that?? Yeah, probably not...so, readers beware...If you feel like something is directed towards you, it very possibly could be, but I will try to refrain from using names.<br />
<br />
<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6515413652588816454.post-62742524458126489202013-12-05T21:49:00.001-06:002013-12-05T21:49:55.167-06:00Dreading TomorrowTomorrow is going to be a hard day for me. I am going to the funeral of a childhood friend who is only 4 years older than myself. At 39 she has lost her long battle with breast cancer. I think I have only been to one funeral since my own mom passed away 5 years ago. I just can't bring myself to go. Funerals are always sad to me, and I always cry, and it doesn't matter if I even know the person. Ugh. I know, I am such a cry baby, but for some reason, it's just harder since my mom is gone.<br />
<br />
I went to the viewing tonight and I was actually able to hold it together the entire time I was there. AS SOON as I swung the door open to leave, I LOST IT! Every time I looked at my friend laying there in that casket, all I could see what my mom. I couldn't bring myself to really even get close enough because I knew I would lose all control. The closer I got the faster flashes of my mom kept popping in my head. Literally. However, tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. I will take myself up there again and pay my final respects to someone who is not much older than myself. Someone that I grew up with. Someone that leaves behind 2 beautiful kids who even though their world is turned upside down, seem to be able to hold it together and have an amazing bond with each other.<br />
<br />
<br />tattooedtrailertrashhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05663810483802107177noreply@blogger.com0