Sunday, March 8, 2015

Parenting

Being a parent is one of the hardest tasks in the world. There is no instruction manual. Everything is trial and error and common sense. Most parents strive to be the best parent they possibly can and sometimes that is hard.
It gets even harder when you divorce and again when one or both parents  get remarried. That's the spot I am in now.
I have tried, and succeeded, in not bashing my ex husband of 11 years in front of my children. I have expressed certain issues and thoughts with my kids as to things that happen(ed) with their father and yes, maybe I shouldn't have at times. I can't take that back. But one things my children have never heard me do is degrade him and call him everything but a fucking human. We are a product of our own raising and I personally want my kids to be more than their parents were. Make sense? It does to me. Maybe that's all that matters.
When you are a parent you should do whatever it takes to make sure your child (ren) are safe and you don't do things that could potentially put them in harms way. Not when it is something that you have total control over.
What I am talking about, (and yes, this may piss some people off) is YOU DON'T FUCKING DRINK AND DRIVE WITH YOU KID IN THE VEHICLE! Yes, I drink on occasion. Not daily. Hell, not even weekly. Yes, I have drank, and gotten drunk, around my kids....knowing that we were all going to be safe and sound because either we were staying at that one place, or someone else that didn't have even 1 drink, was driving.
I am aware that many people, and some of my very best friends, will go to dinner with their families and have 1 or 2 drinks and then load their families up and drive home. I don't judge them, don't fault them in any way. I don't do this. Ever. I will not and have not taken even a sip of fucking alcohol and then drove my kids. It's a rule that I have. It's a rule that their father was in agreement with....until he married this dumb bitch that he married to now.
There have been many broken promises to my kids from their father aka SUPER DAD, that he won't drink and drive them anymore. My kids has issues with this as well.
With all of that being said. Here is what triggered this rant...Keigan went to stay the weekend at her dad's house. I had to make her go spend time with him because she hates going over there because of his wife. His wife who has admitted to hating Keigan....who is 11! This bitch is almost 50 and says she hates the daughter of a man that she is now married to. I have bitten my tongue for the last fucking time.
Anyway, I found out that keigan was at some "party/gathering" and she told me that her dad was drinking and she was scared and didn't want to be there but didn't want to cause problems either. I had her put her dad on the phone and tried talking to him about the situation but that was like trying to drink milk with a fucking fork. He became so hateful and said the most hurtful and hateful things to me while Keigan was standing there. She was hysterical.
I was at a birthday celebration and not in my own car so I called my sister in law, (Scott's brothers wife) and explained to her what was going on and they went and picked up Keigan and took her home with them.
I'm at a loss and not really sure what my options are, but I can assure you that some shit is about to change.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

These eyes

These eyes have seen a lot. They have seen the pain of death, not only their loved ones, but for many others as well.
These eyes have seen love and watched fade away. They have seen the joys and heartbreak of being a parent.
With these eyes I have been able to witness many joys, ups, downs abs everything in between. I wish a few people could see themselves through these eyes. Maybe then they would see what I see, and maybe somehow they would know the things I would say, if only I could it into words. These eyes are my favorite part of ME!

Hair style regrets


Ugh, only because I can't think of anything else at the moment that is appropriate to post about, I will post about my hair...let me just say that I wish I had not cut it off. I am now doubling up on Biotin to help my hair grow faster so that it will grow back out like I had it. If I ever talk of cutting it off again, someone please knock the shit out of me!!!! 
With that being said, I absolutely love having the black and pink again and I am sure I will keep it like this for a while.