Saturday, July 20, 2013

Way behind...

Ugh, where to start? I was asked the other day about my blog and was I blogging about my weight loss journey and posting pictures along the way....well, the answer is NO, sadly. I have not given my blog much attention in the past few months. I feel really bad (just for myself) because this is something I was sure I would keep up with and write about, but...I guess life gets in the way of things, along with boredom, being lazy and everything else. I am sorry.

I do not really have any pictures of comparison, but I will try to get some soon and post them, I promise. I will tell you this many of you know, when the day I went in for my surgery I was 296 pounds. I can not even believe that I throw that out there like it is nothing, when in reality, it is something. It is a huge something. An embarrassment, and a major factor in my depression issues. I was wearing a size 22-24 in pants, and I was honestly at the point that I would almost rather have sat in the house and ate myself to death, than have to look in the mirror and try to fix myself up to go anywhere. See, my problem is not that I eat all the time. I don't eat right, meaning I do not eat 4-6 meals a day which is key for weight loss because you have to get your metabolism up and going. I would also drink my calories by way of fountain Dr. Pepper. BAD BAD BAD.
Instead of having to look at myself in the mirror, I just let myself go. I quit putting on makeup. Quit really doing anything with my hair, and quit giving a shit about what I looked like.

Here I am today, a little over 3 months post op, weighing in at 239. That is 57 pounds GONE! I am down 11 inches between my hips and belly. I am wearing size 16-18 shorts, and I am a much happier person, but not as happy as I could be. I think I will always have self image issues, and I just do not have the motivation to take my ass to the gym everyday. I need to, and I want to, I just don't make myself. I will try to work on that, but...

I go back to see my weight loss doctor in October, and I should be down to 219 by then, but I am hoping I less than that. We shall see how it goes, and I promise I will  try to keep up with this better, for those of you who actually keep up with it.